The Overrated Dead

(A Walking Dead Review By Neamo)

While it may be poor taste to discuss and lament a series a week after it's seasonal finish, this blog didn't exist at a time where posting for it would have been appropriate. I could shamble for a film to talk of or advise you to watch something meaningful and poignant, but frankly I'm in the mood to talk of zombies, and I can think of no better way to do so than to air my frustrations with the Walking Dead. While it is of a split verdict if critical polls are to be believed, I know many who happily and blindly trudge through it's myriad of hammed character portrayals and over easy drama as if it were a shining beacon of good television, and I'm left feeling dour and rather ill over the whole affair.

I'd like to start this rant with two assurances, the first of which is that I am not slathering hatred or disdain upon the comic. It's in poor taste to judge something I haven't put a lot of research or interest into, and while I'm certain that criticisms I raise may stem from it's source material, I have no desire to follow it up. I've been told, rather reliably that the comic is superior, and I am happy believing it to be, but I am by and large not a comic book reader and shall avoid it with the same leisure that I do the marvel offerings and so on. In that sense, consider my critique based upon the show. My second assurance is that this will not be done in bullet point form. I adore bullet points, but it's good to mix the pot once in a while. With that all said and done, let's proceed.

There are many flaws and holes I could pick at in this show, and I will I assure you, but if we are to start anywhere we must begin with the plot. Rick Grimes and his son Carl ( Pronounced Corl or Cooorl if the slurred rasp is to be followed. ) try to survive in a zombie infested world. An outbreak occurred infecting all and sundry and after the various trials and tribulations presented, we're left with a handful of characters banded together toward a common goal and care, attempting to forge a new future from the crumbling ruins of the past. As a premise, that sounds entirely justified. Gruff and weather worn older male attempting to survive with their youngster and a rag tag band of born again survivalists? It's a plot device that, although a little trite, resounds with the general mass. We are then introduced to a cheating scandal by Rick's wife Lorrie, who we'll refer to hereafter as prison food, and Shane, Rick's best friend who goes a tad dark side. You'll understand my frank and enthused summation soon I'm sure. We then proceed to the prison, where the group has changed somewhat, and over the course of several episodes all but the core cast and fan favorites are picked off in situations brought about by casual thoughtlessness from the same group that survived a food-less winter of hell. The thing you quickly begin to grasp is zombies and the hordes of the dead no longer pose a real threat, stupidity is the reaper within this show. In any case, we see the group make contact with and promptly get beneath the skin of the nouveau cyclopean Governor, a title that holds less meaning as he proceeds to butcher every able hand at his disposal. More members of the group are lost through ignorance, and the Governor makes a frankly rather unwanted return to kill off a fan favorite, destroying the cozy confines of their dilapidated prison and forcing the main characters to split up and flee in a scene that left much wanting. They regroup over time, as apparently America is a small place and every man among them has forgotten the hot wiring skills we've become so accustomed to, and make their way to Terminus, a steak house that specializes in soylent greens. I believe that's the recap in a nutshell?

Well, to pick holes in the plot seems an effort of futility, not because it's impossible but because... Well... Look at it. Take a breath and glance over it. To call it a pile of shit would be an insult to mounds of effluence everywhere, it is an abomination. What we're looking at, and what teenage boys everywhere have been lamenting, is a laughable Days Of Our Lives soap opera with shambling corpses drifting casually through the setting pieces. Make no mistake when I say, if you do not remain focused upon the zombie element, the entire series feels like a love letter to the Kardashians or the OC. Over wrought and over emphasized, even it's supposed surprises feel like bland repetition as I struggle to find any who were surprised by the reveal of Terminus's barbeque cook book, and frankly that's more than a little depressing. It feels rehashed. I realize that it is the 'first of it's kind', a television show revolving around the zombie apocalypse, and I understand that it's supposed to be treading new ground, but when I can predict every action and nuance, when I am left with no surprise or sense of danger, what I'm left with is the feeling of wasted potential. How do I mean? Well, this is a show that has fronted old territory to a new medium, and I understand the appeal of that within it's beginning phases, a sense of whimsey and familiarity drawing the veteran fans of the genre close whilst being open enough to appeal to the new. It worked, and snared many including myself in it's opening season, leaving me with a feeling of open expectation. It didn't deliver.

Aside from the brief if laughable introduction and then removal of 'plague zombies', the dynamic hasn't shifted and instead we've simply seen the group become too hardened to the natural threat for it to pose any form of harm outside of human intervention, and so we return to my prior point. If you are fronting a survival show where survival is no longer the issue or premise, it is a vehicle of stagnation. What we've entered is a rather shaky premise for a drama. At each interval, the plot has added nothing dynamic and we are as clueless of the situation as we were at the beginning. The only thing driving this train now is the idea of popular culture references and introducing new groups of humans to occasionally pick off a show favorite. This is not good television. What would I have done? Possibly an evolving sickness, we've seen infected humans and yet the animals are by and large fine, the zombies unintelligent and shambling. From the little we know it reawakens the brain on a basic level. Why not add to it? Why not throw in a little nightmare fuel and, from the top of my head allow the zombies to cry out after being turned in human like calls, perhaps give a faint semblance of residual memory? Necrosis among the living from eating food that has lain in the infected soil? Calcifying zombies? Runners? It seems facetious but that's the gist. The core plot element, the undead, are no longer threatening. Why not do a quick scan of creepy pasta and once more horrify and terrorize?

The acting is sub par, frankly. I'm not saying this out of spite or a bitter vendetta, but the truth of it is that for a show that attempts to explore the nature and emotion of it's cast we are often left wanting with lackluster portrayals that merely serve to highlight the lack of dimension to them. Good and bad has no bridge with this show, and while there are faint flickers of redemption and skill, it's smothered by hammy villain pieces and gruff tough love. Madness for instance, within Rick and others is explored as either a deep rooted hallucinatory delusion which leads to a three episode sob story, or an explosive burst of balls to the wall crazy that has no remission. Subtle nuances of depression? Influential character change? It's sad to say that it doesn't exist. I'm sure everyone is a little depressed and that is why we don't explore it at length, at least, at a length more than an episodic character arc, but it simply comes across as dour. I never feel like I'm at risk from losing compatriots to suicide, which frankly would be a nice change of pace. Instead, it's grizzled and wizened men and bitter or oblivious women in swathes. I'm not going to point out any actors in particular, though from my writing you can probably surmise a few of the greater peeved performances, instead I'm just going to boldly state that by and large the show has neither depth nor emotional warmth. It's amusing that the actors fighting the corpses are so proficient at flat-lining.

The props are decent enough. A location is scouted and secured, and we then see a series of rifles and pillaged goods. It's reasonable enough to say there's little wrong with that in of itself. The special effects of the zombies are to a fairly high standard likewise, and it feels hauntingly like the budget for the scripts has been re-invested within it. There's little else I can fault. If I had another gripe I could truly pick at, it would be over all dissatisfaction with the indolence. I don't profess to be a horror buff, nor do I think my idea's are entirely original, but for the love of god, why is it that the only armor I've seen in this damned show is riot gear? I understand that would lessen the already waned threat as a plot device, but we are entering the realms of the delusional if not one has the common sense to put on a few sweaters, or grab a little PVC pipe and fashion something. A zombie's bite is only proportional to the strength a human jaw can exert before breaking, so why does everyone insist on wearing clothes that might as well have the consistency of tissue paper? The walls were breaking down and zombies are unable to smell human flesh past their own fetid remains as shown within, so why not plug the wall and build with the corpses of freshly slain? Michonne entered the fray with a pair of zombies that we discover will not attack when disarmed of limbs and jaws, and act as both wards to other zombies and pack beasts. Why was this promptly glossed over, and not used and abused by our merry troop? Minor gripes I'll grant you, but there are thousands within this show and they quickly stack up.

To surmise, the Walking Dead whilst initially holding promise remains as lackluster as the fetid corpses it promises. Stripped of any real sense of danger and relying on cheap tricks, we're left with a show riding the wave of it's own pomp and ignorance in sickly sweet soap opera territory. While I would love for the show to be cancelled and it's funding distributed elsewhere, I have a feeling none shall pry the money from it's cold dead hands. I shall keep abreast of it however as I have been, if only to sate my need for bitterness.

A Post Of Thrones

(Game Of Thrones Critique By Neamo)

The time is nigh for many of us to dig out our banners of fealty, and once more swear allegiance to the houses of Westeros. While many stalwarts have fallen to the wayside in events I won't spoil for those tardy few, the summer light wanes in the breaking of winter winds, and winter is coming. I will here and now declare Game of Thrones to be one of my favorite series, both literary and televised. It captures something that has long been missing, a raw edge to the heart rending fantasy that is glossed over or glibly misplaced in the seasoned art of pandering to a control group. A Song of Ice and Fire did not suffer from this of course, as is made famous by George RR Martin's quote, "I want my readers to be afraid.", and while this notion isn't unique to book but surely is a rarity, the idea of systematically destroying your protagonist, it is a sentiment unheard of in television. We've seen the rare unhappy ending, certainly, but in a show where the vile not only survive but thrive, and good is measured only by the shades of grey, such an idea can be considered a revolution to the format.

However, something I see repeatedly, in fact, more so than any other burgeoning topic on the show itself, is the announced statement that this is the greatest show of all time. Now, being an enormous fan of the Game of Thrones world set before me, and I do mean enormous, proclamations of grandeur aren't things I on the whole feel the need to argue with as when all else is boiled away, it certainly is awe inspiring. The idea however that it is the greatest show of all time gnaws at me for a variety of reasons, and so in my own contrite manner, I'm going to explain why I believe it isn't the greatest show of all time, but why in that same vein it has the potential to be.

• It's ongoing ; That's pretty self explanatory, but the fact of the matter is we've none of us far sight, and not one among us can claim to be a green seer. There is an ENORMOUS margin for error with this show and the way it's written, and as mentioned in interviews, the show is going to take a divergent path from the book in order to retain it's built fluidity. What does that mean? Well throughout the show we've seen subtle changes from the books, little odds and ends that otherwise would make for nothing too harrowing but in the same stance are not as they should be. Arya's hit list is somewhat different, certain characters seem more integral than they would in the source material and new characters have fanned in like the prostitute Roz in order to add some familiarizing warmth, until it is extinguished of course. With a greater divergence likely spurred on by the show's gallant sprint toward the casually meandering book releases, we'll find differences that could easily be acceptable, even laudable, the dialogue between Arya and Tywin for instance being one of the many highlights of the show, or we could see this taking a Walking Dead plunge from grace. Search your heart, you know it to be true Corrl.

•  It's characters and cast change frequently ; This is a statement I'm not entirely sure people will get a great handle on, so I'll expand in depth. This is a show that prides itself on the ideal that no one is safe, and that is for the most part entirely factual. There are a few instances of characters with plot armor, we know for instance that Daenerys will survive as without the mother of dragons hamming up her ancestry, things would become rather dour across the narrow sea. There are other characters afforded this 'plot armor', and we'll see that, but as a general rule of thumb no one is beneath the books. As such, when I tell you that of the scant handful of familiar faces we have currently more shall fall and fresh faces anew shall join, it should worry you. You'd be a fool not to be. These are actors frankly who have proven their salt and made us care for them, so in each of their deaths a lingering hole remains that must quickly be plugged by a new and tender face. Thus far the show has been fairly adequate at plugging gaps and shuffling, but the fact of the matter is it won't be too long before entire segments and episodes of the show are dedicated to these newly emergent faces, and we might see the acting prowess slope when some of our more esteemed and established stalwarts fall. I realize this is prospective, but if you are telling me that this is the greatest of all, you must settle for this conjecture until the product is finished.

 

• It relies too heavily on shock ;  I know I'm going to get some flak for this if anyone is to read it, primarily because that is the central draw of the show itself. Knaves! Swords! Nudity! Bastards! All wrapped up within a delicious plot of sparse magic and winged reptiles. It's the moniker of Game of Thrones and a large mark of it's success, and I can't fault the ideal behind it as the books themselves revel in these topics, but even the gore soaked texts don't amount to the Caligula like mounds of flesh that we find ourselves immersed in. It seems facile to say back in my day, but certainly in a time not too long past to see a dwarf fondling tits, you had to have joined the darker of the gentlemen's clubs, and lurked in their seedy waters. That might seem offensive to say, but it's entirely factual. There are concepts expanded upon in this show that ordinarily couldn't be televised, not to mention the conceptual incest plowing, bare bodied lesbian grinding and other acts of debauchery previously locked within the pornographer's cellar. That's not to say the smut of the show is it's downfall, although frankly it would be a fine thing for the director to learn that when it comes to breasts more is less, no, it also ties in to the entire premise of the show at large. Main characters dieing is part and parcel of the format, we know what we're in for. Without spoiling the events of the previous series for anyone yet to catch up, we've just bolted a hurdle that will be pretty hard to top, and another approaches rapidly in succession. With the passing of the coming events, the pace will ultimately slow once more in the calm before the storm and it will be interesting to see how fans react to the slowing roller coaster that is the plot after this. Without the shock, what will the show be? Will the producers have to dip more heavily from one excess into another? It begs the question, what is left when we've become numb to the offerings?

• It's characters don't develop within the story ; "NOW HOLD ON!" I hear you cry, "That's an opinion that has no warrant! Look at the funny guy Tyrion and... And..." And thus my problem begins. The characters certainly do grow a little and the show is very good at portraying duality, but we switch attention from post to post too quickly to see a great deal of systematic growth. I'm not saying they are two dimensional constructs, though let's face it, most are drawn from well known stereotypes, I'm instead saying the events and their progressions while doing something to mark and mar the perceptions leave no deeper scars. We're left with the same characters as erst they were, no huge bounds of sanity, no crumbling morals or climbs of redemption, sans Lannister. It feels strange for me to say that there is a polarized effect, but when you can sort out who is an asshole by their family name we've entered the dark and sticky realm of character trait rolls, and in many ways it does feel like we're in the hands of a seasoned dungeon master watching the rolls play out. What would I say has good character development by example? Well Breaking Bad had some of the best, if not the very best character development of perhaps any recent series to date, and certainly the ideals and nature of man are expressed in fantastic depth in True Detective. Perhaps watching those would give you a better idea of meaning to the phrase. In any such case, for all the cleverness and beauty, there is little growth on either side. Revelations? Certainly. Acts of scant redemption? Why yes. Growth? I'm afraid we're a half man short.

So! When all is said, what are we left with, to surmise? It's certainly a show of terrific standards, and it rises above many others quite literally in draconian strides. Does it sit upon the televisual throne however? No, perhaps not, but it could given time. I shall be watching with delight, in any such case.